THE SONIC BOOMER
I thought I had seen it all until I got to Pea Ridge, Arkansas.
Located in northwest Arkansas (which likes to distinguish itself from the rest of the state by referring to itself as NWA), Pea Ridge was nothing but a sleepy little farming community for ages and ages. Then it woke up one morning to the sobering realization that it had been “discovered.” My husband Mark and I discovered it this summer while driving around, exploring.
These days, there’s construction everywhere — rows of homes where rows of peas used to be; all the same fast food restaurants the big cities have; and a very fancy car wash with LED lights inside and windows along one whole wall for the claustrophobic.
“Let’s get the car washed,” I said to Mark. (I love rumbling through a fancy car wash.)
It was upon exiting the car wash that we saw the drone. It was huge! It looked like a kiddie ride at a carnival had broken loose and was charting its own path. Intrigued, we followed it, and watched in awe as it settled into a magnetic port next to 11 more giant drones in the back parking lot of a Walmart. What the heck was going on? Had we stumbled upon a secret military base? An agricultural spy station? Some weird weather experiment?
Turned out it’s Zip — a high-tech drone delivery system attached to the Walmart. Yes! If you live in the Pea Ridge area and are sitting on your front porch in your boxers and a T-shirt, and your car is out of gas but you suddenly feel the need for a coloring book and a box of crayons, a Walmart employee will bundle those things up for you and attach the package to one of its drones.
The drone will then rise majestically into the air, silently speed toward your home, avoiding all vehicular traffic, quietly deposit your art supplies onto your lawn, and scoot back to its base to await its next delivery.
And, get this — if you’re one of their Walmart+ members, the service is free, at least for now.
Think of the possibilities! Prescriptions, diapers, chocolate…
I Googled this modern marvel and was stunned at the questions Walmart has had to answer about this thing;
“Will Zip deliver anything?” No, you moron, Zip will not bring a recliner and an 85-inch television set to your home. Well, they didn’t say “moron,” that was me.
“How much does a drone pilot make annually?” None of your beeswax. No, again, that was me. The average is $71,000 per year plus perks like tips.
“How did you choose Pea Ridge over New York City?” Again, me.
I just can’t get over coming across this thing in a town with a population of about 8,000. But I’ll tell you one thing — I’m looking into buying a home there… preferably something with a big, drone-friendly front yard.
